Uncomfortable!

Well, this morning reminded me once again why I HATE any type of tube! This morning Lauren's pump beeped off for me to flush her and when I went in to do so her bed was wet and I noticed that her med port on the j-tube had come undone! I immediately flushed her, closed her med port and started her feeds again. She was extremely pale and when we checked her bloodsugar, it was 32. We were able to rouse her but she was unable to focus or know what was going on around her. Jeff immediately gave her a blessing and I ran for the cake frosting. I couldn't find any at first so I poured some coke and we got it down her. Her bloodsugar didn't come up after a few minutes but went down a little instead...then we remembered the cupcakes...we scraped frosting off of them and Jeff forced her mouth open while we rubbed cake frosting in her cheeks. I was just getting ready to access her and give her D-50 when we checked another BS and it had come up into the 40's. We knew then that she was on her way back up. She was still not responding really well to us but we got her up and walked her to our room and she layed on our bed while I stripped hers and helped her change out of her wet pjs. I was so very frightened! After we saw she was back up to normal and I could take a breath again, I called Dr. Muenzer and told him about the events of the morning. He, like Jeff and I, is desperate to find a solution so this won't happen again. We came so close to losing her again this morning and after things calmed down I went into the bathroom, knelt down and thanked Heavenly Father for looking out for her and for priesthood power that exist in our home. I am thankful that Jeff honors his priesthood and is worthy to give blessings anytime day or night. My comfort level with this tube has gone way down and I will struggle to find a balance again. I will be up all night long checking on her because I will worry! Libbi was over at Momma's house and she came and spent the morning with me and Lauren while everyone else went to church. It was so comforting to me to have her here. I am blessed with a wonderful family. Jeff told me earlier he is more worried about me at this point because I am so stressed out. I know Heavenly Father is watching out for her and for that I am grateful but my mother's heart holds a lot of worry. I will try very hard to turn that fear to faith. I am thankful for the blessings of the gospel. They strengthen me in every way!

Settled!

Right now our life is somewhat settled and I am loving it!! Sometimes I spend so much time worrying about when the "other shoe" is going to drop that I don't enjoy the peaceful periods in our life; however, right now I am trying to focus on the present and enjoy each day! Lauren is doing amazingly well with the J-tube and her lab work reflects that! She still has migraines but we can't control them when weather fronts decide to come! We just have to work thru them! Michael is doing wonderful and he is happy which makes it great! This is Emily's last year of school and she is really finishing up strong! She takes her compass test on Wednesday to get into Wake Tech and she is going to get her massage therapy license and then continue on to get her degree in physical therapy. It is so great to see her taking control of her future and making plans. She is loving and compassionate and we are so thrilled with the wonderful young woman she is turning out to be! Life is good for her! Jeff is busy and happy at work and I am trying to do some "spring cleaning" to get my house in order! Right now we are enjoying this "peaceful" time and are grateful for the blessings the Lord continues to send into our lives daily. We feel the windows of Heaven opened to us in so many ways! Yes, life is good and I do not take that for granted...ever!!!

General Conference

Conference week end is always our favorite and we look forward to it twice a year! On those week-ends, we gather our family together, have a late breakfast, spread the blankets around and get comfortable and listen to the wise counsel we receive from our righteous leaders. Jeff always cooks out hamburgers and we make good desserts, Grandma and Gramps come over and we just enjoy being together as a family! It is our chance to take time out of our busy hectic lives and do what matters most. We were blessed this year to have Jacob and Brittany join us for all the sessions of conference and it was so much fun to hear Jacob's thoughts on the different speakers. We watched "Joseph Smith, the Prophet of the Restoration" in between sessions on Sunday and it reminded me of how thankful I am for what he did so I can have the blessings of the gospel today. I always hate for the week-end to end...I am uplifted and determined to try harder to live as Heavenly Father wants me to. I felt even more blessed this week-end as this was the first time in 2 years that my family was together for our tradional conference week-end...the last 2 years, I have been in the hospital with one of the kids and had to watch it on the computer so this was especially nice for me! I am reminded of things I need to do better and re-committed to the things I am already striving to do! There are wonderful blessing all around and I am thankful for a living a prophet to show us the way to make it safely back home!!!

NERVOUS!!!

Last night a member of our stake presidency called me and asked to me to take the assignment to speak at the Saturday night session of stake conference in 2 weeks! I am so nervous about it but honored to have the opportunity to speak. I will be spending much time praying, pondering and studying the topic I have been assigned! My only hope is that I will be able to have the spirit with me so that I can speak the things the Lord wants them to hear. I am grateful to share my testimony with others and am thankful for the blessings the Lord continues to pour into my life!

Family Update!

I don't ever send out christmas letters updating everyone on our family but I figured I would do that on the blog so that those that want to know how our family is doing can read it, and those that aren't interested don't have to click and read!!!

Jeff: 2010 proved to be a tough year for him with the economy being so unstable. He left CD Corp back in the spring, did some consulting work and then got a job offer to come back to Constrata in September. In January, he was asked to take the position of Operations Manager and is once again busy doing what he loves to do. It is nice to see him happy and fulfilled at work. He is also busy serving in his calling at church and loves serving the Lord! He keeps us all on track at home and sets a perfect example of Christlike love for us to follow. He is my rock!

Jean: 2010 kept me on an emotional roller coaster with so many changes in our family happening all at once. I spent many hours on my knees asking for divine guidance as we went thru job loss, hospitalizations and keeping our kids on track with school. Heavenly Father's hand has been upon our family though as we never went without a way to meet our obligations, had wonderful doctors taking care of the kids, and everyone is progressing in school as they should. The housework seems to never end and there is always something for me to worry over but 2011 has started with blessings being poured out from above so I am grateful more than anything! I love my family and being a mother and wife is the biggest blessing in my life.

Emily: This is her last year in highschool and I can hardly believe it! It seems like only yesterday when we sent her to kindergarten! Time goes by way too fast! She earned her YW Medallion in the fall of 2010 and we were so proud of all the hard work she did to accomplish it. She serves on the stake YAC and loves being involved with planning and carrying out events. She continues to maintain the highest standards and sets a perfect example for her brother and sister to follow. She is filled with compassion and we are so blessed to be her parents! She strengthens all those around her.

Lauren: 2010 was a very hard year for Lauren! She spent the month of March, the month of August, and half of September, October and most of November in the hospital. She struggled with unrelenting stomach pain and finally at the end of September the doctors discovered that her stomach muscles and nerves had quit functioning. She went thru much testing and finally surgery to place a j-tube to be fed continuously thru. She had some scary moments in the hospital but was well taken care of and loved by the wonderful staff of Nurses at UNC Children's. Her doctors are amazing and fuss over her like she is their own. Since she has been home, she has steadily improved and her faith and testimony of the power of prayer and the priesthood have increased tremendously. She has had courage in the face of fear and overcome all the obstacles that were in front of her. Just this past week we were told that her labs were the best they have ever been. She is clearly being blessed by the Lord. So happy to see her healthy and happy!

Michael: In 2010 he turned 12 and received the Aaronic Priesthood. It was a wonderful blessing for us to see him worthy to hold the priesthood and a blessing to see him pass the sacrament and learn his duties as a deacon! He loves scouting and his happy, optimistic view on life is contageous! He continues to wow us with his ability to write and he loves to read all the time. He gave his first sacrament talk a few weeks ago and blew us away with his understanding of the scriptures! We are blessed to have such a joyful son in our home!

Noah: He is not with us physically but he made his presence known to us this year as he watched over his sister. When she had a medical crisis, he was there to comfort and assure her that all was well! His powerful influence and example in our lives brings us peace and we look forward to the day when we will be reunited with him! So thankful to be an eternal family!

Well, there you have it....the happenings in the Coombs household! We are continually striving to be a little better each day. Sometimes we take great strides forward and sometimes we take baby steps but we are always trying to move closer and closer to the Lord. We are feeling the windows of Heaven opening to our family and the blessings being poured out in great abundance! For that we are more than grateful! We love all of our family and friends and feel extremely blessed to be part of all your lives...you make us better and we are grateful!

Happy New Year 2011!

I have been thinking over the past year and what goals I had set to see if I actually completed any of them. I did complete a few, which made me happy, and I am determined to do better this year. My goals for this year are as follows:

SPIRITUAL:

1. Read the Book of Mormon 4 times (a yearly goal).

2. Read the Sunday School Lesson each week and ponder it thru the week.

3. Read the Ensign each month.

4. Go to the temple at least twice a month.

5. Fast monthly.

6. Pray Daily!

7. Complete Visiting Teaching each month...100%.

PHYSICAL:

1. Follow the Weight Watcher Plan and journal food intake each week - strive to lose 1 to 2 lbs. a week.

2. Do some type of physical exercise each day working up to 45 minutes a day.

3. Get a proper amount of sleep each day (even if I need to take a nap).

TEMPORAL:

1. Plan healthy meals each week and budget that amount of money.

2. Save at least $5.00 a week.

3. No "spontaneous" spending.

4. Work on building up food storage by buying a storage item each week.

I know these seem like lofty goals but I am determined to reach them. I want to stretch myself this year and work hard to become the best me that I can be. I am thankful for the power of prayer and how it helps me when I feel like I can't reach higher. I am thankful for the blessings that have poured out to us this year and I know the Lord is always aware of my family. I am thankful for His guidance and I know that in this new year, He will continue to guide me and help me be all that I can be! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Lauren's "Reporting" Debut!

Lauren got the opportunity to report from behind the scenes at the UNC Radio/Telethon this year...since she was already in the hospital, it was easy for her to do! She had a wonderful day and we wanted to share with everyone her reporting experience! We are so proud of her...she did a fabulous job!!!

Missing Noah....

Last night after Emily put my beautiful white tablecloth on my little table and sat Noah's tree on it, I began to decorate it. For whatever reason, it seemed particularly teary for me this year. With each ornament I hung on his tree the tears welled up more and more inside of me. Every ornament on that tree has some very real signifigance for me and as I looked at each one, I pondered over the person that gave it to him and what memory it brought back to them...there was the little sack of table salt, the golf cart, the camper, the "Cars" cars, the computer, the angel ornaments, the M&M, the toy ones, the white shirt with the missionary tag, and all evoked an emotional response from me but there were two that opened the floodgates...one was a silver one that said "2007" and it had red crystals on it...it had come with a note and it was beautiful and brought me to tears as I read it and remembered that that year will always be one that will only be remembered by me as the year my world turned upside down..then I looked at the red crystals and read the note and it reminded me that Christ will bring Noah back to me..then I smiled. The other were a handful of rainbow colored candycanes that also came with a note..I reread that note after I carefully hung each candycane and the tears came as I thought about Noah's "rainbow shirt" and how much he loved it...I could hardly ever get him to take it off long enough for me to wash it...then I thought about him running around in that shirt and the tears turned to laughter. Every year after I hang those ornaments, I re-read the notes...they are vivid reminders to me of how loved my precious Noah is and how he is still missed by not only me but others as well. Noah's tree is a constant reminder of not only him but of all the love that that tree respresents....it's an expression to me of how his life touched so many others and his memory and his legacy will go on and on and on. I sat down by my little tree last night with all the lights out and only the little "rainbow lights" on his tree shining and my eyes glazed over with tears as I thought about my precious boy....it was quiet in my house and then I looked down at the table where I had set everything up and under the tree was the plaque that was given me last year....it says, "because someone we love is in Heaven, we feel Heaven in our home" and I thought, "yes, that is so very true....he is always near". It was my quiet, reflective time...my time to just spend with Noah...how I miss him. I miss his smile, his laughter, his beautiful brown eyes and his gentle touch. I miss the sound of his voice as he would call my name and his delight over the smallest things. Yes, he is here...he is always near. I know that now more than I have ever known it.....everyone may only see a family of five when they see us but we are most definitely a family of six....he watches over us and although I can't see or hear him, I know he sees and hears me so I know he hears me when I talk to him. Merry Christmas my Noah...you are definitely my angel and will always be.

Thanksgiving/Black Friday!

I am so VERY VERY GRATEFUL that we were able to come home with Lauren from the hospital on Tuesday and that made for a very Happy Thanksgiving at our house! Since Lauren is now on 24 hour continuous feeds it is making her feel much better and her mother much more nervous...since we came home, I get up every hour or so throughout the night to check the tubing, bloodsugars, add more formula, flush the j-tube and so forth. We have put some safeguards in place and are working on others but in the meantime, I am just so glad to be home in my own environment with my family!!! I ALWAYS go Black Friday shopping with Momma and Emily so even though I am really tired, I still HAD to go! I slipped down one step yesterday (don't even ask me how because I don't know...) and my foot bent in half underneath me. At first it hurt like heck but I thought it would go away and I was determined a few hours later to go ahead with my shopping plan. We left the house at 11 pm on Thursday evening, hit Wal-Mart first then moved onto the other stores and I arrived back at home at 7 am this morning....needless to say my foot was THROBBING and when I took my sock off I knew I had done more damage than I thought! I did, however, get the bargins I went hunting for with the help from the son of a woman I met in line...bless him! It was another fun time (even with the foot pain) and I'm hoping my insistence at going out on Black Friday has not ended up with a broken bone in my foot! I love being home though and so glad my Lauren is feeling better! It's been a long 2 months with lots of emotional rollercoaster ups and downs but this year I cannot be more thankful for my wonderful family and the blessings that are mine...the Lord has blessed us to be home and Lauren to be on the road to recovery! Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!! :)

Emily and I on our way out the door

Shopping in Wal-Mart

My "hero" of the day, Trevor

Waiting in the checkout line

My poor swollen aching foot

Scary

Yesterday was a frightening day for our family! Yesterday morning Lauren's monitor went off at the nurse's station and when the nurse came to check on her, she was unresponsive and not moving! She immediately called a "Code Blue" and I prayed so hard. They were able to get her stablized and made the decision to move her down to the PICU so they could watch her closer. We spent 24 hours down in the PICU and came back up to the room today! I am so thankful for the power of prayer and for the love and support of so many. I don't know how I would have gotten thru this day without my family and friends. Jeff and I are grateful for the power of the priesthood that blesses not only Lauren's life but ours as well. We are thankful for the many prayers and fasting that have and are being offered in Lauren's behalf. We feel the strengthening power of prayer and know that the Lord is in control! It has been a long 2 days but tomorrow we are happy to celebrate Lauren's 16th Birthday! She is a fighter in every sense of the word and I am very thankful!

Settling in....

Dr. Muenzer came in yesterday and he is pleased with how well Lauren is handling the tube feedings. Her weight and color have improved. She has more energy than she has had in several months and he is pleased with her bloodsugar control at this point; however, he told me that as far as he is concerned, the clock has not even begun to "tick down" as he calls it. He wants her to be able to tolerate the feeding thru the tube during the day and then be able to drink her cornstarch overnight to maintain her bloodsugar levels so that she won't have to have the feeds 24 hours a day. So, as he told me yesterday, once we get to the point where she is on just her feeds during the day (no IV along with it) and taking her normal cornstarch amount overnight, then he wants to watch how well she does for at least a week before they do the surgery to insert the J-tube. That means it will more than likely be another 2 weeks before we get to surgery for the J-tube and then another week or more after the surgery to recover and get back to what her home regimen would be. We will more than likely be here until the 1st week in November if all goes well! Can I just say that we feel like we have moved in! I am already tired and by the end of this visit, I will probably have aged a 100 years....or at least I will feel like I have. The last few days have been an emotional roller coaster for Lauren...she is finally coming to terms with having to be hooked to a pump 15 hours a day and that is frightening to her on so many levels! She is afraid of the J-tube surgery, afraid about the pump itself, afraid that when she drinks the cornstarch again it is going to be more painful that she can tolerate and worried about her health in general. I have watched helplessly as she has struggled to get hold of herself and find her faith but she has done so. Yesterday Jeff and Duane came up and gave her a priesthood blessing which helped her tremendously! I could not help the tears from falling as I watched her sob with her daddy and then I watched Jeff and Duane tenderly talk to her and give her the love, support, and strength that she needed. Duane offered a beautiful prayer before he and Karen left and the spirit in the room was powerful! I witnessed last night the power of prayer and fasting and faith as Lauren got hold of herself and drank her cornstarch without complaint or fear and then was able to go to sleep peacefully! I watched my brave daughter face her fears with profound faith and assurance that all is going to be well. I felt as if angels were watching over her and strengthening her and my own faith was strengthened. Her doctors are working tirelesly in her behalf and between them and the strengthening power of faith, she is improving daily! It is a long road, but we are traveling it with complete trust in the Lord.

Some Better days...

The last few days have been better.....Lauren is up more and she is going upstairs to the teen room each day which makes me happy. She is consistently doing her physical therapy each day (even though she says it hurts her but I keep reminding her that the more she does it, the stronger she will get physically). Since I am trying to encourage her, I got my exercise DVD tapes up here so I am going to do my "Walk Away the Pounds" up here each morning so she will see me doing something good for me as well. I think it will help relieve the stress I feel as well. So far Lauren is doing very well on the feeds...they are going to go up here again a little today as we continue to work toward a goal of 100 cc/hr. So far she has not had any major diarrhea (which they are concerned about) and now they are watching her blood sugar control...that is a concern if her intestinal feeds will be able to maintain her bloodsugar control but I am choosing to have faith that all of this will work out. Lauren and I are watching conference together up here which is bringing a great spirit into our room. I am thankful for modern technology that allows me to be able to watch conference from anywhere as long as I have a laptop and can get wireless internet. It is truly a blessing for which I am most grateful! So even though we have a ways to go, for right now things are going very well and Lauren is improving everyday. I see the Lord's hand upon her and it gives me great comfort and peace. I don't even have the words of gratitude for everyone who is fasting and praying for her and our family but I do want all of you to know that the Lord is hearing and sending comforting peace and strength to us as quickly as He can. My heart is bursting with gratitude and my love of the Lord is increasing all the time. I am so thankful...so very thankful. I love you all.

Weary.....

Well, we have now been in the hospital with Lauren a little over a week and will probably be here for at least a few more weeks! My emmotions have been a roller coaster as I have met with her doctors and I have listed to their thought process and their concerns for Lauren. It has been difficult at times for me to hear their concerns but they know that I have to know what road lies ahead. I just have to keep having faith in the Lord and know that He is in control! They have started Lauren on the Nd feeds and are slowly increasing the rate each day! So far things are going okay. She had a good day yesterday and was up and out a lot but last night she was tired and achy and didn't feel well. Her blood sugars were dropping a little more than I wanted to see them so I had them up her rate until I saw them get back up a little. They gave her some muscle relaxants to relax her muscles last night and that seemed to help her fall asleep. She slept peacefully thru the night. I am thankful that things are looking up but I am also cautiously optimistic. Dr. Muenzer said last night that this is going to be a slow process and we will probably be here from 2 more weeks to a month if everything goes as they hope it will. I am continuing to pray for Lauren to be able to tolerate these feeds, for Dr. Muenzer to keep everyone on the same page, for the GI doctors to be directed in how they care for Lauren, and for Jeff and I to have peace and feel the direction of the Lord. This is a difficult period of time we are going thru and I am thankful for the many prayers that are being offered up in behalf of my precious Lauren and our whole family!

Selfless.....

Even though Lauren is fighting not only a bloodstream infection (which can completely wear you out), she is also battling this horrible stomach pain which is causing her not to be able to eat, yet she went to her nurse the other day (when she was also running a high fever) and told them that she wanted to make me a birthday cake for my birthday. The recreational therapist got involved and this afternoon after Lauren was upstairs in the recreational teen room for a couple of hours (after an exhausting day of testing), she came down carrying this chocolate cake that they had helped her make for my birthday. I was so overwhelmed that I could barely speak without crying....it was one of the most unselfish things Lauren has ever done. As hard as it is for me to be up here on my birthday, to know that even though she doesn't feel good, her heart was thinking of me, made my heart burst. I'm so blessed to have my children and for the joy they bring to my heart! I am so thankful for my little girl who put her needs to the side to try and celebrate this day for me. I love my Lauren!!!

Seeking, Pondering, Praying

Sometimes writing is what I do when I feel out of sorts so this is that kind of post. The last few weeks have been challenging not only for Lauren but for us as a family. Jeff and I really thought that bringing Lauren home from the hospital when we did was the right decision to make even though she was still struggling to overcome her stomach pain and eat again. I felt like once I got her home, then she would start eating but that didn't happen. We continued to force what we could down her and I pondered and wondered if we had made the right decision. Each day brought with it a different challenge and on some days it was all we could do to get liquid of any form down her. I fought back feelings of returning to the hospital and even though I accessed her port a cath and kept it accessed because I was worried about her becoming hypoglycemic, I still tried hard to keep her home. But watching her spiral downward was becoming more than I could bear and the emotional toll was weighing heavily on me. Finally this past week-end, I knew we had to do something as she was not making any progress and really going backwards. By Sunday night, Lauren had reached her breaking point. She cried with Jeff and I and told us how she didn't feel like she could continue struggling the way she was...she was exhausted. We talked endlessly to her of the love her Father in Heaven has for her and how He will never leave her to struggle alone. We asked her to pray and ponder and then the Lord would whisper to her what to do to overcome this monumental challenge. Jeff and I both felt helpless and I fled to the bathroom, dropped to my knees and cried many tears to the Lord in behalf of my little girl who was struggling to overcome the mountain that lay in front of her. The next morning I called Dr. Muenzer and he became insistent that she come in but I just didn't know if I could take another hospital visit. I began to pray and ponder then I turned to my family and friends and asked for their prayers in our behalf. We all felt like we had come to the end of our road and were hitting a brick wall. I felt defeated and alone....when Jeff and I talked, we both were unclear about what to do but we decided that if we trusted Dr. Muenzer then we had to follow his recommendations to us....I didn't sleep well Monday night because I replayed over and over in my mind what having a tube of any kind down Lauren might mean. It made me physcially sick and I prayed for strength to overcome my great fears. Jeff and I were both awake early yesterday morning and we talked for a while. I felt some peace return to me in his arms and I knew that whatever else, we had to do what was best for Lauren. She needed us to be strong for her and help her. Dr. Muenzer called me early Tuesday morning to tell me that they had a room for Lauren and she needed to come in. I got up and took a shower feeling a heavy weight on me and then I got a phone call from Becky...she asked me for Kim's number and said that she wanted to hold a 30 day fast for Lauren. She would get Kim to organize my family to fast each day and then our other friends would fill up the rest. She reminded me that we were not walking this road alone and that Heavenly Father would answer our pleas. It brought me to tears and I knelt in prayer with an overwhelming feeling of graititude in my heart. As I was packing to come, Lauren woke up from a nap and had fever....I knew then in my heart that coming back to the hospital was the right thing. I was so tired coming back in and the nurses up here on 6childrens were so overwhelmingly loving and kind. They have a deep love for Lauren and they knew how stressful things have been for our family. I was grateful for their love and compassion....they definitely make these hospital visits easier to deal with. We found out today that Lauren does have an infection in her bloodstream and they are running all kinds of IV antibiotics to her. It is a wrinkle in our plan but we will deal with it. It has definitely made my 4 or 5 day hospital stay turn into a 2 week minimum hospital stay...I'm not thrilled about that but definitely glad we are able to treat it. I'm not looking foward to them putting down an ng tube or having to do any kind of permanent tube...that is very difficult for me but the Lord is helping me to overcome that as I need to have Lauren better and whatever that takes, that is what we will do. I know the Lord hears our prayers and I pray he forgives my slackness at times because lately I have been more tired than normal and I need to work harder at doing all I can to live the gospel. Dr. Muenzer told me this afternoon that we are still facing an uphill battle and we are far from over but at least right now I feel the Lord's strengthening hand in my life and I know it is coming because of the multitude of prayers being offered in behalf of my family. There is no way I can possibly thank everyone for their love and support. I only hope they all know how much it means to me to have a wonderful family and fantastic friends whose love and support I could not live without. They make all our challenges easier because we know we do not walk alone.

Back to Normal???

Well, this week has been my week to get my act together and try to get our family back on a "normal" schedule. This last month our whole life seems to have been tumbling upside down and I have not been able to keep it all under control...BUT...this week, I was determined to get things together (in my mind at least) so I made a plan...I love to make a plan because at least I FEEL like I am doing something productive. Each day I decided to do a little something to get us back on track. Jeff started his new job this week, Emily gets up before dawn and goes to seminary so I put my "plan" to get things organized into action. I sat for several hours on Monday at the computer putting my lesson plans for the school year into a calendar format so I would know what we would need to accomplish each day. I cleaned the kitchen, the bathrooms, the laundry room, caught up the laundry and gave my kids a list of things to accomplish, studied for my seminary class and taught it on Wednesday evening (even though Lauren was the only one who came so we made Michael participate..hehe)! I even managed to get Lauren to sit with me while we cleaned up her "art space" (a HUGE accomplishment) so I was feeling like life was getting back to normal and then today hit and it reminded me what our "normal" is....I fixed breakfast and actually got Lauren to eat some grits (her favorite breakfast food) but they didn't stay down but a few minutes...that started us on a downward bloodsugar spiral that ended up with me accessing her port and praying that we would not be going to the hospital yet again! After I watched her closely for hours and checked umpteen bloodsugars all while doing school with Emily and Michael, finding time to do the laundry, keep the house in order, check in with Dr. Muenzer to give him an update on Lauren and beg him to let me watch her at home, "listen" to my scriptures while I ironed some clothes, cook dinner and send Jeff off to do something for one of home/visiting teaching families, I sat down and realized that this is what normal is to us and I might as well just enjoy it..haha! I still have more studying to do to prepare for seminary next week and I am up late waiting to give cornstarch but my prayers tonight were full of thanksgiving...for Jeff having a good job, for Lauren being able to maintain her bloodsugar control, for having the energy to clean my house, cook dinner, do homeschooling and for the opportunity to serve another person. My life may not be what other people consider "normal" but it sure is wonderful to me and I am thankful for my "abbynormal" (as Jeff calls it) life! It constantly reminds me of my dependence on the Lord and for that I am extremely grateful!!! :)

Thankful!!!

As I write this my eyes are watering because I am so grateful to Heavenly Father for answers to my prayers. I wonder sometimes why we aren't given things immediately when we pray for them but I do know that Heavenly Father hears our prayers and answers them in His wisdom and timing. This past week, I have been so discouraged that even when I turned to my scriptures, even though they gave me peace, I didn't see how we were going to survive yet another downturn in our economic situation. Jeff and I sat in the temple together and we prayed together, as a family, and individually for direction and for a way to open up. There just seemed to be nothing...and then out of nowhere, Jeff's old boss called him and wanted to talk...Jeff went and today he sent Jeff an e-mail that they want to hire him back. He will be going to talk with Bruce on Monday. It isn't the perfect scenario but it surely is a huge blessing for us at this point in our lives and I could not be more grateful to Heavenly Father for lighting a path that seemed so dark just a few days ago. I know that if we just keep having faith, even when that faith seems so weak, that Heavenly Father will bless and sustain us. I know that as we continue in faith, the Lord will pour out his blessings upon us and we will feel the windows of Heaven continue to open. My heart is full of gratitude. Thank you all for your prayers in our behalf...once again, the Lord has never let us down...my testimony of His ultimate power continues to grow! I know this job came as a result of many prayers and much faith! I am very thankful!!!

Home at last!

Just a quick post to let everyone know who reads my blog that we are finally home from the hospital. After praying and pondering about what to do, Jeff and I sat down with the doctors and we made a really hard push to get Lauren home. I was a little worried at first that I might be pushing her too hard but everytime I prayed, I felt that it was right so we forged ahead, and with relatively no problems (which the doctors were sure we were going to encounter), we were out of the hospital within 24 hours of our decision to make a big push! Jeff and I were pleasantly surprised on Sunday afternoon when Lauren started eating "real" food again and she has done amazingly well! She is regaining her strength and we can tell the Lord is blessing her in many ways. I am so thankful for the power of prayer and that when I really stop and listen, the Lord allows me to feel my decisions regarding her are right. Jeff and I stood united with the doctors and felt strengthened as we worked together on the right plan. Thank you all for your prayers and love. We have felt them very strongly and appreciate your continued support of our family! So glad to be home and getting somewhat back to normal!!!

Accupuncture!!!!

Well, we are trying an unconventional method that I have done some research about to help pain...mostly they do it for headache pain (which Lauren always has even when it gets better). So, I found out that UNC has a Certified Accupuncturist on staff and they consulted him at my request to come see Lauren. He came today and put those little itty bitty needles in her head, on her shoulders, her feet and all over her stomach! He left them there for 30 minutes and had her rest quietly. After 30 minutes, he took them off and asked her how she felt. She told him that her head and shoulder pain were GONE!! Oh yay!! It didn't work with her stomach pain but he said he wants to bring her some kind of herbal supplement and mabye do another treatment on Wednesday!!! Anyway...it was worth at least trying so I was happy to have Dr. Chen take a poke at her! She was really good about it....he wants to see if it keeps her head pain away so we'll find out! At least we have one issue resolved this time around!!! I wonder if they have accupuncture for fat people...maybe it would make me not want to eat....oh wait, I think that is hypnosis or an even better idea would be to just stop eating..hahahahaha! Oh well, can you tell I am tired?????? Here is a picture below of Lauren getting her treatment...

TIRED!!!

The last few days have been very tiring for me. Although Lauren's head pain is much better, her stomach pain is fierce and unrelenting. The last several nights she has not been able to sleep thru the night because of the pain and so we both have had very restless nights. It has been a difficult several days. Yesterday, Brother Smith came up and extended me a calling from the stake as a seminary teacher. Although I am excited to teach, I am more than overwhelmed at the huge responsibility it is and wondering how I am ever going to get it all done with all that we have on our plate already. I am very overtired so it doesn't take much to push me over the top right now emotionally. In fact, Dr. Muenzer came in this morning with Dr. Muge and the other doctor (can't remember her name) that is following them and I burst into tears. I love them because they know how exhausting both physically and mentally it can be for us up here. Dr. Muge is taking over for Dr. Muenzer and she has some more ideas that she thinks may help Lauren in the long run. They have called in the "Pediatric Pain Team" and they have put her on a "pain pump" that she can push every 10 minutes and will give her a controlled amount of pain medication over the next 24 hours so they can see how much she needs. Tomorrow afternoon they will then take that information and transfer that to a "pain patch" which will give her a controlled dose throughout the day. Because Lauren has "chronic pain", they are going to work with her to find a way to control her pain and get her better at home as well! Her "attending" doctor this week is wonderful and I got a really good feeling talking to him. He is talking with Dr. Muge and together they will all work to come up with a good plan for Lauren. Dr. Meyer came up this afternoon to visit with her and we all feel like we are now on the same page. I am just really tired and want to get Lauren better! I am hoping that we won't be here for another month! Please pray for our family that other areas of our life will also be resolved as we press forward with faith! I feel like the weight of the world is on our shoulders right now....I know we will get thru this time, it is just a lot right now!!! I continue to pray for more faith and trust in the Lord! Thanks everyone for your love and prayers! I love you all!!