Miracles!

Jacob did a great update on his life that I read a few minutes ago. At the end of his post he asked the question...have you prayed for your miracle? I thought about that as I read it. I thought about what exactly a miracle is and how they come about...sometimes I am finding that the miracles are so small that we tend to overlook them, or at least I do. As we begin this holiday season I have been reflecting over the last two years of my life...what has taken place and where I am today...I face yet another holiday season without Noah. My friend gave a wonderful quote the other day...it said,
"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, (protecting its sanity), covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But, it is never gone." Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
I agree with that statement. I have experienced the kind of pain that sears you right down to your soul and yes, with time, it has healed some. During these last two years I have prayed mightly for strength, for more faith, and I have spent much time in the scriptures, pondering in the temple and striving to serve more faithfully. Thru those experiences I have experienced a miracle of healing thru the power of the atonement. I never really understood the healing power of the atonement until I needed it myself...it has washed over me and soothed my broken heart. It is filling the awful hole in my heart and soul with a deeper and more profound love of the Savior and my Father in Heaven. I still have moments when the tears and the pain return but I turn to my scriptures and I find peace and solitude...today I experienced a little miracle and it came thru my nephew, Jacob. His words on his blog at the end penetrated to my heart as he asked the question, "Have you prayed for your miracle?"..... my first thought was yes, I have and it hasn't happened..I'm still struggling, I'm still lacking, I still don't have what I have prayed so hard for the Lord to send to me and then I stopped myself in mid thought....I have so many miracles in my life..I have three wonderful children on this side of the veil who live the gospel and strive everyday to be obedient....I have one child on the other side of the veil that is about his Father's business and has finished his probation here on earth and returned with honor to his Heavenly Father...he is waiting for us and watching over us and I am sure praying for us to always choose the right. I have the most wonderful, faithful, stalwart husband in the world and I am blessed that he honors his priesthood and serves the Lord with faith and devotion. I have a mother who understands completely my pain and still has the ability to lift me with her strength and help me to look beyond this moment and see what it truly important to me. I have so much more than money or things could give me. As I begin this holiday season, I have much to be thankful for...I have the gospel of Jesus Christ and I have an eternal family. I have more love offered to me than I can comprehend and I feel grateful for my rich blessings. The pain of not having Noah here with us will never go away but thru the miraculous healing power of the atonement I can be certain of where he is and that his love transends thru the veil to us everyday. We will celebrate the birth of our Savior this year with more humility and realize the most important riches that we have are one another. Our love will grow and expand and I will find ways this holiday season to help my children understand the beauty of our Savior's mission here on earth. Yes...this will be a season of miracles for me...the kind that I need and the kind that will bring me closer to the Savior...and that is the greatest miracle of all...His gift to me...and I will cherish it like no other!